Angst
by Saun
Summary: Happy Birthday T! I know I'm rusty. This is the first fanfic in a while.


Angst  
  
PG  
  
By:Saun  
  
A fic for the elusive angst-addicted T.   
  
Haruka was loitering in the area between the gates at the Tokyo airport. She ran her hand through her still slightly damp hair. She'd showered and changed in anticipation of the coming night. The only problem was she couldn't remember which gate she was actually supposed to be at. She paused sliding her hands in her pockets. 'Shimatta.' Why hadn't she just written it down. Then she wouldn't have to wait around here like a baka. She'd also left her cell in the car. When would this day get better she wondered with an impatient sigh. She turned and caught a glimpse of something familiar looking. Could that be...? Haruka eased a bit to the left so she could see around the portly businessman in front of her. Haruka moved closer. That really did look like .... "Michiru-san?"   
  
The woman's head turned and Haruka's heart gave a nervous pound. The delicate profile was unmistakable. Haruka involuntarily took a few steps toward her.   
  
"Haruka-san," she acknowledged with a half smile. "How are you?"   
  
Neither woman moved to embrace.   
  
"I'm good." Haruka shifted a bit. "Waiting for someone?" she asked casually.   
  
Michiru gave a small but genuine smile "Yes." Her eyes looked dreamy for a moment.  
  
"It must be someone you care about very much," Haruka observed with a wry grin, wishing she could recall the words even as they spilled out. In her pockets her hands clenched.   
  
"She means the world to me. The most important person besides..." The words trailed off, the thought didn't need completing. In this thing at least they still had perfect understanding. Uranus and Neptune well knew where their ultimate allegiance must lie.   
  
Haruka relaxed a bit finally taking note of Michiru long long hair. It reached below her waist. The waves cascading down and calling attention to her narrow waist. So much longer than high school. She was wearing a dress. Designer by the look of it. It probably in itself had cost as much as one of Haruka's car payments. She was still a beautiful woman Haruka admitted. It was amazing to her that she had ever held this lovely creature in her arms and caught her cries of passion with her own mouth. .   
  
She couldn't even remember what Michiru's skin had felt like on her hands. The gentle waves of time and new experiences had washed away those memories, before Haruka had realized that they were gone. It was for the best, of course. The blonde noticed with an internal start that Michiru was eyeing her changed form as well.   
  
The violinist tentatively reached up and gently caressed the creases at the corner of Haruka's eye.   
  
"Too much sun and not enough sunblock," she chided softly.  
  
The soft brush of skin on skin awakened a wrenching burst of remembrance. Haruka shrugged away from the touch and Michiru's hand fell to her side still open.   
  
"You sound like someone's mother," she teased, hoping that her eyes wouldn't reflect the tumult of emotions she was repressing. Focusing on the artist's cheek instead of meeting her gaze full on, she noticed that Michiru's own face appeared curiously unlined and did not seem to reflect the passing of the years. Screwing up her courage she snuck a quick peek at her former lover's expression.  
  
Michiru's eyes remained serious. They were luminous with suppressed emotion.   
  
At a loss for words they stared at each other. So many years and much unsaid lay between them.   
  
Independent of each other in a way that was never meant to be, two minds evaluated and acknowledged the insurmountable wall that lay between them. In the stillness the promise of something wonderful shuddered for the last time and died.   
  
Haruka was growing uncomfortable with this impromptu reunion and she searched for something to say. "I heard about your wedding."   
  
Michiru smiled ruefully, "It's difficult when you marry an idol. Everyone wants the details. That's why he eloped with his second wife."   
  
Haruka stifled a wince. "Gomen." She was getting restless and her eyes pulled away from the woman in front of her and began scanning the faces of the people hurrying through the terminal. She swallowed convulsively needing to escape.   
  
"Well, I really have to..."   
  
"Mama!"   
  
Michiru turned toward the voice. A little girl no more than six came hurrying through the crowd as fast as she could go without breaking into an unladylike run. Carried carefully in front of her was a violin case.   
  
Michiru's entire demeanor changed. Her eyes softened with a deep love. Haruka had seen that look in the violinist's eyes years ago... just before she had pulled her hand free from the slender fingers that were now drawing the child into an embrace.   
  
Haruka's gut lurched as the painful memories broke through to the conscious part of her mind. Life had never been the same after that day. They had grown further and further apart. Then it had all ended at the battle with Galaxia when Neptune not understanding what Uranus had intended to do. ..had killed her before she would let Uranus take the bracelet from the evil golden one. Haruka had never forgotten the coldness in those eyes as Neptune sought to destroy her former partner before Uranus could 'betray' them as the senshi of embrace had supposed.   
  
"Michiru?" she had whispered in pain and confusion, her body blasted by submarine reflection. "I... " Her soul had departed then. Quickly and violently had ended the last stand of the Outer senshi. Haruka had forgotten many things but Galaxia's cold triumphant laughter had echoed in her dreams for many years after.   
  
She had never tried to explain herself to the rest of the senshi. They had been confused by the sudden distance between Haruka and Michiru. The Outers had been in silent agreement. No one would ever know.  
  
'I trusted you with everything.' Haruka thought. 'How could you of all people not have believed in me.'   
  
There had been no apologies of course. Each partner felt justified in what they had done. Haruka couldn't forgive and Michiru wouldn't forget. Haruka still saw that bright morning when she had left the house they had all shared for the last time. Michiru had stood at the door, silent, arms folded. The breeze had whipped at her skirt. Haruka had paused for a moment...waiting ... the moment passed and she returned to her apartment in the city. Both wounded to the quick, they had never spoken again, until now.   
  
Mastering herself, Haruka's teal eyes traveled over the little girl. She had Michiru's hair. Even arranged in pigtails as it was she could see traces of stubborn curls. The child could have been a model; her clothes were tailored - as if Michiru would have it any other way. The child catching sight of her eyed her suspiciously. Blue eyes devoid of trust...   
  
Michiru paused in her fussing over her child seeming to suddenly remember the blonde racer's presence - as if she could have forgotten. "Himeko-chan, this is my friend from a long time ago, Tenoh Haruka-san."   
  
The little girl bowed slightly. "Konbanwa, Tenoh-san."   
  
Michiru smiled into Haruka's eyes with a mother's pride. She had wrapped her slender arms around her child from behind holding her protectively.   
  
"Konbanwa, Himeko-chan," Haruka returned graciously. 'Himeko-chan' so close to 'Hime-chan'. Did Michiru think much about those days when they had been raising Hotaru? A normal life was all that she had ever wanted. It seemed now that she had it. Could they have found it together? 'What if' was a dangerous game.   
  
'What if I had opened up to you?'   
  
'What if you had trusted me?'   
  
A knot bloomed in Haruka's throat and she knew she was momentarily robbed of speech. She blinked rapidly composing herself. 'I should ask for her phone number...just to check in or catch up.' She opened her mouth. "Mi..." it was little more than a croak.   
  
Just then she was caught in a strong embrace and kissed firmly on her tan cheek. Surprised, Haruka's arm automatically wound around the slender waist of the woman, steadying her.  
  
"Robyn!" she greeted the red head with a lover's warmth.   
  
"I've been looking all over for you." The Australian accent was apparent. "Hold this for me."   
  
Haruka accepted the camera case with ease born of practice.   
  
"Robyn, this is my friend from high school Kaioh Michiru -san. Michiru-san, this is Robyn, she works for National Geographic."   
  
"G'day. It' a real pleasure to meet you. I'm a fan of your work."   
  
"Thank you." Michiru accepted the compliment graciously. "I am always glad to meet a friend of Haruka- san's." Michiru smiled warmly. Here eyes seemed to truly show regret as she continued "Please forgive us for leaving in such a hurry but we have to collect my daughter's luggage. Sayonara, Haruka-san."   
  
"Michiru...san. Until we meet again." Haruka finished finally. Their gazes held for a moment and then the current broke and time moved foreword again washing away thoughts of what might have been. Michiru and the child disappeared hand in hand into a crowd of American schoolgirls   
  
Haruka watched them go, wishing...what?   
  
"I've missed you so much!" The woman beside her gushed. " and I really can't wait to get home and get these pictures developed. Where did you leave the car?" ____________________________________________________________________________   
  
Haruka eased out of the parking space, letting down the top of her silver-blue convertible. Robyn chatted easily beside her about cougars and other things she had seen on her trip. Haruka half listened as she concentrated more on the feel of the wind in her face. Out of the corner of her eye she saw a black stretch limousine pull out of the parking lot going the opposite direction. 'Goodbye, Michiru,' she thought with a flash of intuition.   
  
"Haruka, are you paying attention to me?" the woman beside her asked with amusement in her voice.   
  
"Of course," Haruka answered. A wicked grin full of sensual promise swept over her handsome features and she echoed a remembered night from long ago. "I don't intend to let you go tonight."   
  
The End  
  
...Or If you prefer... As I do ¬.¬:  
  
Haruka eased out of the parking space, letting down the top of her silver-blue convertible. Robyn chatted easily beside her about cougars and other things she had seen on her trip. Haruka half listened as she concentrated more on the feel of the wind in her face. Out of   
  
the corner of her eye she saw a black stretch limousine pull out of the parking lot going   
  
the opposite direction. 'Goodbye, Michiru,' she thought with a flash of intuition.   
  
"Haruka, are you paying attention to me?" the woman beside her asked with amusement in her voice.   
  
"Of course," Haruka answered. A look of resolve dawned over her handsome features and she echoed a remembered night from long ago. "I don't intend to let you go tonight." Not for all eternity. 'I can't.' She hooked a quick U-turn. Robyn caught her breath beside her.   
  
"Haruka?" she gasped. All of the blonde's focus was on her driving. She steadily increased her pressure on the gas pedal to the floor weaving between cars.   
  
"What are you doing?!" the red haired girl shrieked.   
  
"Something I should have done a long time ago," the blonde tossed out with a quick glance over her shoulder. It was clear she decided, just barely missing the bumper of the BMW as   
  
she cut him off. Haruka was flying. She hadn't driven this fast since high school. When   
  
she'd been young and stupid. Very stupid. 'You're always true to your feelings.' Hadn't Michiru said that. Really though Haruka had been long denying the wave of emotion that had finally crashed over her and blotted out everything else. She caught sight of the black limo just ahead and she gunned the motor, oblivious to the panic of her soon to be ex-girlfriend.   
  
'I'm sorry.' She thought quietly to the woman beside her, but this is best for you and for me.   
  
Michiru cradled her daughter against her. The limo swerved slightly and she glanced out the window. She registered the blonde who was keeping pace with her window. "What on earth??"   
  
The limo driver blew the horn.   
  
"Mama?!" Himeko cried out, clutching at Michiru's waist. Michiru's hands were shaking as she fumbled for the intercom. "Pull over!"   
  
"What?" the driver yelled obviously thinking that they were under attack by a rabid fan. Which was partially true. He obeyed though.   
  
The convertible pulled smoothly in behind them.   
  
Michiru stepped out the wind whipping her hair. She recognized that the senshi of Uranus was in the grips of extreme emotional upheaval. This awareness alone squelched her sparking anger. She extended her hand, palm up, questioning, as her voice failed.   
  
Haruka had leaped over the car door and stood looking into Michiru's eyes. She gently took the trembling hand and pressed it to her chest. Michiru could feel the throbbing beat of Haruka's heart. The very one she had stilled with her split second reaction during a long ago crisis.   
  
"Haruka... Haruka, I'm so sorry. What did we let..." she trailed off, long repressed silver tears sliding down her cheeks.   
  
Haruka threaded her fingers through Michiru's free hand and pulled her into a healing kiss full of yearning and unspoken promise for the future. The fierce wind died down, replaced by a calm breeze. Michiru pulled back, looking down. Haruka tipped up the heart shaped face and for the first time she saw forgiveness shining in the blonde's face.   
  
"I think she'll be proud of us," Haruka commented, an image flashing in her mind of the Princess, her eyes alight with love and joy at their reunion.   
  
"This won't be easy,"Michiru's softly voiced comment reminded Haruka of their audience. With her arm wrapped around the woman that she loved she turned to face them. Today's present   
  
pain would be more than made up for by the beckoning joys of tomorrow.   
  
Notes: Well, if you got this far you know I'm still a fluffy author. Gomen you angst-philes.  
  
I want to try to get some more things written. Finally breaking out of this dry spell.  
  
Arrigatou to my beta readers Selina-chan and "Robin" Sorry your name sake unlimately got dumped...wait a minute... I'm not sorry at all:) Kate you are the most unbelievable editor and sounding board. This fic wouldn't be half what it is without you ^_^ 


End file.
